While on the trip, we took a tour of Antelope Canyon, a stunning slot canyon in Arizona. Rob stumbled upon online photos of this place by accident a couple months ago, and I'm so glad he did because visiting this canyon was a highlight for all of us.

And that's despite the fact that the guide was a complete loon. She would tell rambling personal stories of absolutely no relevance and then hurry us all around the corner because "I've been here since 6 this morning and I'm tired and want to go home." She actually didn't rush the tour - in fact, it went longer than it was supposed to - but she set an odd pace of hurrying up just to launch into a tangent just to hurry up again.

She also insisted on telling everyone which photos to take. A slot canyon is a very difficult place to photograph, and I think she was trying to be helpful (although she knew diddly-shit about photography and seemed mostly just to enjoy bossing people around). At stop after stop along the way, she would order us to "Stand here and take that photo." And then we would wait until everyone stood there and took that photo. We couldn't not stand there and take that photo - she INSISTED that everyone with a camera stand there and take that photo.

I will admit that I have added this phrase - Stand here and take that photo - to my personal repertoire. Rob tends to carry the camera (and take photos) more than I do on trips. When I see a shot I think would be nice, sometimes I ask for the camera but more often I'm too lazy and just point in the general direction of the shot and say some variation of, "Hey Rob, get that one." But the problem is that Rob doesn't always understand what I want him to take, and by the time I explain what I'm looking at ("I like the way the light hits that rooftop over there") I could have just taken the damn photo myself. Which is why I'm liking this new phrase: Stand HERE and [pointing] take that photo. So clear! No confusion! Plus it makes us chuckle.

So as the tour guide led us through the narrow, winding canyon, alternately pointing out strange rock formations (an eagle, Bill Clinton's nose) and telling us what she bought her husband for Father's Day, Rob stuck to the back of the group so he could shoot his own photos and avoid having people in them.

This did not go over well with the tour guide. She needed us all to be together. Now, I get this. You can't have people wandering around on their own. But Rob was never out of sight; he was just trailing ten feet behind. "Sir!" she would repeatedly shout from the front of the group. "Sir! Stay with the group. I need you up here!" Rob would amble close enough for her to shut up and then immediately lag behind again, getting shots. Honestly, I think what annoyed the guide more than anything was that Rob wasn't standing here taking that photo. (These photos are the result of his rebellion, which was clearly worth it.)

I bounced between Rob and the rest of my family, hanging back with him for awhile and then catching up to walk with them. The guide soon figured out our relationships and offered to take a family photo. Rob was dragging behind, so she took one of me with my parents and brother and then as Rob caught up she said, "In-Law! Stand over there with the rest of the family."

My brother and I nearly lost it, nudging each other while biting our lips to keep from laughing. Soon we couldn't hide our snickering, though, as the guide continued to call Rob "In-Law" for the rest of the tour. "In-Law! Stay with the group!" "Come a little closer, In-Law." "In-Law! Stand here and take that photo."

And I confess that after the tour ended my brother and I took it upon ourselves to continue referring to my poor dear husband as "In-Law." For the duration of the trip. Because we are assholes. And also because it's friggin' funny, I'm just saying.

So not a gambler, but I had to at least do a slot machine. Won $1.75, then gambled it all away. The addictive part, for me, was pulling the lever.

We were at the MGM Grand, and I insisted we pretend we were in one of those casino heist movies where they try to blend in on the casino floor and talk into their sleeves and dash through all the hidden corridors. Rob was not exactly game for playing along, but at one point we did take the stairs instead of the elevator, and the minute we pushed through the door the fancy décor stopped - the stairwell was all cinderblocks and pipes and it was just like in the movies! I was pretty sure that from the stairwell we could find a service door that would lead us to the vault, and then we'd just need to replicate someone's fingerprint or eyeball in order to break in. Or maybe crawl through a duct and drop from the ceiling.

We're back home now, and today's my birthday. 28.

"Just living is not enough...One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower."
-Hans Christian Andersen

We had two stops in Greece - Santorini and Corfu.

Santorini is absolutely picturesque, one of those rare places where human structures actually add to the beauty of the landscape. Whitewashed houses sit clustered atop dramatic cliffs, their doors and domed roofs the same hue of blue as the sea. The most striking part of the landscape is the water-filled caldera, the center of which is a volcano. One of the largest eruptions on earth occurred here thousands of years ago, and some people believe that before the eruption Santorini was the location of the lost city of Atlantis.

During our day in Santorini, we were content to stroll around and just enjoy the natural and manmade beauty visible at every turn. The village of Oia was particularly pretty, and we ambled slowly through, stopping often to take photos or pop into shops. Then we sampled wines at a vineyard. Because of the high volcanic ash content of the soil, grapes in Santorini are distinctly different; the vines grow low to the ground like bushes, and the grapes themselves have a unique taste. We didn't really like the wines we tasted, although the olives we were served were so good.

Our tour guide in Santorini was a petite, very pretty local woman who had an adorable way of speaking. She spoke English well, but with a Greek accent. And she had a couple phrases that she repeated often as she shared information with us. She would sometimes begin sentences with I must tell you... as in "I must tell you that the volcano erupted thousands of years ago." Also, she would say, "What I am about to tell you will surprise you." And then she'd share a fact that we did not find at all surprising. She was very cute. And now Rob and I cannot help but start conversations with "What I am about to tell you will surprise you."

Click to see Santorini photo gallery.

Corfu was another place, like Dubrovnik, in which we didn't know what to expect. But like Dubrovnik, I found it to be delightful. Corfu boasts an eclectic combination of architectural styles - Byzantine, Italian, French, British. The Old Town is a winding maze of streets, much like Venice but without the canals, anchored on each side by a fort.

Our first stop was the New Fort. (And by "New" they really mean newer. It was built in the 13th century.) In addition to great views of the city, it had hella-cool underground tunnels. The four of us were like kids exploring the peepholes and darkened passageways. In fact, we lost track of time, and when we emerged, the fort had closed for the day, locking us in. (In our defense, neither Doreen nor I knew the fort closed at 3pm. The guys were told this, but apparently didn't deem this information worth sharing or abiding by.) When we returned to the only entrance/exit, the heavy iron gate was padlocked shut. We all looked at one another, and it was clear we were all thinking the same thing: How do you escape a FORT? I mean, shit, being insurmountable is its entire purpose. As we walked around in search of an employee, we talked about how this would never happen in the States because we're so worried about liability. (This contrast is apparent everywhere - so many spots I could have fallen into a canal in Venice, for instance. Here, that city would be a lawsuit waiting to happen.) I usually find this relaxed, laidback attitude refreshing, although I found it significantly less endearing when faced with spending the night in a freaking fort.

Of course, we didn't have to sleep in the fort. We never found an employee, but during our search we encountered another group of visitors. We could see them from where we were standing on the wall, and we peered down at them as they proceeded to the gate....and marched right though. They must have had a key, because when we rushed down to the gate, we found they had left the padlock open. Hurray! Ironically, later in the day I ended up scaling the other fort's gate, this time to get IN. This one also closed at 3, but I wanted to see part of it. So I climbed the gate. (My goody-goody husband, of course, did not.) This gate was not nearly so impressive, however. It was a side gate, not the main one. Totally surmountable, as it were.

Kelly the Conqueror

Unlike most of the places we visited, Corfu was really buzzing with locals. They all emerged in the evening, and the energy was palpable in the streets and at the outdoor cafés. In that sense, Corfu felt more like a contemporary city, albeit one with a rich history whose streets and structures seemed to take us back in time.

Click to see Corfu photo gallery.

We didn't know what to expect from Dubrovnik, Croatia. One of Rob's colleagues raved about the place and we'd seen it mentioned fondly in several travel magazines, but we had no idea it would be as awesome as it was. In addition to the cobblestone streets, tiled rooftops, and narrow alleys that are typical (but nonetheless charming) of Europe, the hella-cool thing about Dubrovnik is the wall. It encircles the city and the entire 2 km circumference is walkable. We spent a couple hours up there, walking and gazing down at the quaint little city below.

Dubrovnik reminded me a bit of Old San Juan, Puerto Rico, which is another place I loved exploring. Only a small remnant of San Juan's old city wall still remains, but its forts offered a similar experience and similarly gorgeous views.

It was strange to walk the wall and stroll the streets of Dubrovnik knowing that in recent history it was a city under seige. We found a map on display that notes where damage occurred from the war - direct impact, fires, shrapnel. It was remarkable to think that this lovely tourist attraction and UNESCO World Heritage Site was, within my lifetime, part of a war zone. Rob remarked that it made him wonder about the cultural losses in other places currently at war. We worry about the lives lost and homes destroyed in a place like Baghdad, for example, but we'd never really thought about the museums and statues and architecture being demolished as well.

Click to see Dubrovnik photo gallery.

And then in contrast to our thoughts of lost cultural artifacts is Ephesus (in Turkey), a place that seems to suggest a certain timelessness. To walk through an ancient city is surreal. Maybe this is just an English major thing, but to be in a place where ancient Greeks and (later) Romans once lived fucking blows my mind a little bit. We walked through the ruins of the Temple of Apollo, touching the pillars that this ancient civilization erected. I was standing right where people came to consult the oracle. Holy shit. Or perhaps you're more impressed to think that this is the same Ephesus of the Ephesians to whom the apostle Paul wrote letters. We even visited an amphitheatre where he gave a sermon. Blows my fucking mind, people.

One interesting tidbit that particularly pleased Rob was something our guide told us about the statues that lined the main street of Ephesus. The statues portrayed the important leaders in the city. But the heads of the statues were actually a separate piece from the body. Rather than removing the entire statue when a new person took over a position of power, they simply lifted the statue's head and replaced it with a head depicting the new leader. How's that for forward thinking?

The only food we had on the entire trip that we did not care for was in Turkey. Our guide took us to a restaurant that served a buffet of traditional foods. Most of it was unremarkable, although a couple dishes were pretty good. But what we will forever remember is The White Sauce. Several foods were covered in a thin white sauce, and I was the first of the four of us who happened to taste it. It was terrible - tasted sour, in fact, although all the dishes with white sauce tasted that way so it must have been intentional. I didn't say anything about it to the others because I didn't want to affect anyone else's opinion. But I watched carefully when I saw Doreen lift a sauce-covered bite to her mouth. And I will never forget the expression that crossed her face when she tasted it. It was a combination of horror, disgust, and near-nausea. "That was my opinion as well," I said, laughing. However, the baklava was divine.

Click to see Ephesus photo gallery.

Venice. We spent basically three full days there, which was sufficient to see the city and the nearby islands of interest. Rob and I plan to do a more complete tour of Italy someday, centering around Rome, and Venice could not conveniently be included in that itinerary. So having the cruise depart from Venice on this trip worked out nicely. I feel that we toured it well and do not need to go back. I very much enjoyed being there, though.

Expectations certainly affect one's perception of a new place, which is something I saw most clearly on this trip. There were several places, which I'll describe in future posts, that we did not have high expectations for. Or, really, just didn't have any expectations for. And those turned out to be the ones we enjoyed the most.

For Venice, I had tempered expectations - unlike, I suspect, most people who visit Venice. I went knowing that the place is a tourist town. Sometimes, in fact, visitors outnumber residents. The city is clearly tailored to tourists - for example, every waiter we encountered spoke at least five languages: Italian, Spanish, French, German, and English. And many restaurants offered a "Tourist Menu." I knew to expect typical tourist trappings, and I think this understanding enabled me to appreciate Venice despite that. I also had read Elizabeth Gilbert's description of Venice as gray, drab, and depressing. I had braced myself for that, although it certainly was not my experience at all. We had gorgeous blue skies for most of our time there, but I can see how the buildings might fade to gray under an overcast sky.

One criticism I do have, however, is the lack of inviting public spaces. There are plenty of plazas, to be sure. But most welcomed nothing more than to walk on through - no benches or fountains or a reason to stop and enjoy. Also, there was very little green space, and the few spots that we found were not well maintained. I couldn't help but compare this to London's plentiful and manicured parks and lawns that were always packed with people. The plazas in Venice, with a few exceptions, were pretty much empty except for people passing through.

Regardless, we found Venice a delightful place to wander. No vehicles of any kind are permitted - it is a pedestrian city. All the guidebooks call it a labyrinth and suggest you tuck away your map and just explore, which is basically what we did. The streets were significantly less busy on the weekdays we were there than during the weekend. But even on Saturday, crowds weren't a problem when we stayed off the beaten path.

Like anywhere in Europe, one of the most striking things about Venice is the architecture. A building so exquisitely ornate that it would be celebrated as a destination here in the States is but one of hundreds in Venice. And to think how old those buildings are sorta blows your mind. Most cathedrals kept their doors open, and we always popped in for a quick peek. I like the moment of stepping from a bustling street into the hushed interior of a holy place. It's an immediate shift for the senses - the elaborately decorated sanctuary is dark, cool, silent, and has that slightly musty smell of old things. I like to think of the many high-ceiling capsules of cool, quiet contemplation sprinkled throughout the busy city.

We spent the majority of our time in Venice roaming the streets, strolling down alley after alley, never sure where we were about to end up. (Surely our most commonly spoken phrase in Venice was, "Wait...have we been here before?") That was my favorite part, I think - not knowing what we were going to find around the bend. The street we're on might open into a huge plaza or bring us to a bridge or lead us to the door of a looming cathedral. Sometimes, we turned a corner only to come to a stop at the edge of a canal. It was delightful. And the one guarantee was that whatever awaited you, it would be lovely to behold.

Click to see the entire gallery.

(Despite the abundant beauty of Venice, Rob and I were frustrated in our attempts to photograph the place. We never felt we did it justice. I'm sure the failure lies with us, but I would also argue that Venice is one of those places in which seeing a photograph cannot even begin to approach the experience of standing in the street. You are literally surrounded by views at every step, and it's the cumulative effect that is so stunning.)