Three strikes and I officially dislike you:

Strike 1: The MARRIAGE = [male stick figure] + [female stick figure] bumper sticker on your car.
Strike 2: Driving 22 in a 35. In front of me. On my way home from work.
Strike 3: When the lane divides into two, TAKING THE LEFT LANE AND CONTINUING TO DRIVE AT 22 MPH SUCH THAT EVERY-FUCKING-BODY BEHIND YOU HAS TO PASS YOU IN THE RIGHT LANE. ASSHOLE.

*deep breath...going to a happy place...ah yes, JOHN STAMOS*

I have a date with John Stamos tonight! I have been looking forward to this all day. Okay fine, all weekend.

Jake in Progress - ABC - 9:30pm

He's going to be in like, EVERY SCENE, y'all!! I think my heart might explode.