1. I was born on my great-grandmother's birthday.
2. I am afraid of falling. Not heights, but the actual act of falling.
3. I have never had a cavity, a broken bone, or stitches.
4. I've always wanted to be a mermaid.
5. This is my favorite number and ring size.
6. I have only been in love once in my life.
7. I do not believe there is only one "soul mate" for each of us.
8. I have cows for neighbors. No, really.
9. My family, my life, is in Redneck Valley. But if I were alone, without those connections, I would choose to live in New York City.
10. My preschool teacher once told my mom I was "bossy." That hasn't changed.
11. I cannot bend over and touch my toes.
12. I don't like to hold babies.
13. I have a visceral fear of snakes which I call my Adam and Eve Complex.
14. I do not believe in Adam and Eve.
15. I never wear shorts, unless I'm working out.
16. I "collect" metro rides. I have ridden on subway trains in Paris, Madrid, Mexico City, Toronto, San Francisco, Atlanta, DC, New York, London, Philadelphia, Boston, and Chicago. (updated 9/05, 4/06, 6/06)
17. I hate card games.
18. I hate kickball.
19. I love steak.
20. I have never been really drunk. Tipsy yes, but never silly-stupid, stumbling, don't remember anything in the morning drunk. Losing control, even for an hour, scares me.
21. If there's a next life, I wouldn't mind coming back as a pampered housecat.
22. I dread going to the eye doctor more than going to the gynecologist. Eye drops are evil.
23. I am left handed but do almost everything, except writing, right handed.
24. People say I have boyish handwriting.
25. I have a special talent for guessing the contents of wrapped packages. I get this from my mom. (Bring on the presents, yo!)

Remember how our A/C was broken? Like, ELEVEN days ago? Well last week the A/C repair dude finally came to fix it. Only he wasn't sure he did. He said he made it better but it still wouldn't be great. What the fuck? Yes, I spelled it out, THAT'S how what-the-fuck I feel about this. In fact, this should have been my WTF? rant yesterday, but at the time I thought our A/C was working pretty damn well.

WELL, that is because yesterday it was cool here in Redneck Valley. Today? Not so much. And tomorrow is supposed to be 86 degrees, "mostly sunny and pleasant." PLEASANT?! Um, 86 degrees is only pleasant when you have operational A/C! Which we determined this evening that we most definitely DO NOT have.

I cannot tell you how many times I have exclaimed, completely exasperated, that "I just cannot take this HEAT!" all the while fanning myself and patting my forehead with a tissue. It's official - I have become my grandmother.

This whole broken A/C thing really bothers me. And did I mention I'm hot? Mostly hot, with a little bothered thrown in. I don't want to be bothered, considering tomorrow is my birthday and one should never be bothered on one's birthday. But also...also one shouldn't be HOT on one's birthday! Not against one's will anyway. And here I am going to be hot AND bothered on my birthday. That shit ain't right.

On a happier note, Rob has been in the basement for nearly 45 minutes wrapping my birthday presents. Granted, he is a slow, meticulous wrapper, but still, 45 MINUTES! That's a long time, y'all!

(Wait, it just occurred to me that the basement is currently the only cool place in our house. Oh, he'd best not be down there soaking up the coolness under the pretense of wrapping a pile of presents...)

Ooh, on another happy note, I just got an ecard from John Stamos! Heh, speaking of being hot and bothered....

In honor of my birthday, I went shopping yesterday (which wasn't my birthday, but since when do I actually need a reason to shop?). I brought Dakoda the digital camera along in my purse so I could get this week's SPD (public restroom) shot. And since I already had the camera with me, I figured I might as well document my shopping trip. Because truly, if you all lived near me, I would have dragged you shopping with me. But since you don't live near me, I figured I'd drag you along via the blog instead.

So here is a collection of dressing room shots. Yes, I always act like this in the dressing room. (Oh, like you all DON'T.) Well okay, I might have posed it up a bit more than usual since I was having my very own photo shoot (which, by the way, I highly recommend). But don't go thinking I think I'm all that - believe me, I am not taking myself seriously here.

(Click on the photo to see the entire collection.)

Strike a pose, there's nothing to it.