So Simon's latest thing is jumping down the laundry chute. He paws open the door and then dives down into the laundry piled in the basket at the bottom. One of these times the laundry basket is going to be empty and the little fucker is going to break his leg.

Once he jumps down, he is stuck in the basement until one of us comes home and discovers he's missing. When we open the basement door, he is sitting there on the top step, patiently waiting. He looks up at us like "Hi!" and then rushes past and heads directly for the damn laundry chute again, flinging his furry body headfirst down the hole before either of us can stop him. He's like a toddler on a slide, running up the ladder and sliding down, running up and sliding down, over and over again. Except he's not a toddler. He's a cat, jumping down the laundry chute. Which is weird. And annoying.

This weekend we installed a latch on the door. So far it seems to be working, but I'm not convinced it will hold for long. One of Maylee's idiosyncrasies is that the door to the bathroom closet (where the laundry chute is) MUST BE OPEN. She will walk into the room, open the closet door, and then walk out. You can imagine how a neurotic person like me feels about doors standing open - they drive me crazy. So I shut the door. And then Maylee opens it. So I shut it. And Maylee opens it. So I shut it. And now Simon opens it, too. So I shut it. For now, the door is staying closed with the latch. But it's making Maylee insane. She keeps trying to pry it open, and sooner or later her persistence is going to pay off. And then I'll be back to closing the damn door every 5 minutes. And Simon will be back to plummeting down the laundry chute.

I swear the universe gave me these particular cats as punishment for not wanting kids.