sliding doors
kelly | 12 March 2008 - 6:01pm
Over the weekend I watched Sliding Doors. It's one of the few movies I own. I adore it, and not just because of John Hannah, with whom I would be absolutely smitten if Doreen hadn't already claimed him as her future husband.
The film, if you're not familiar, explores the concept of how something seemingly insignificant can affect one's life immeasurably. One of the first scenes is the critical determining moment in the main character's life - in one instance, Helen misses the train she is trying to catch, and in the other instance, she squeezes through the closing doors at the last minute. The film then follows the two divergent paths of her life that result from the difference in that split-second, playing out what happens to the Helen who misses the train and to the Helen who catches it.
We've all read the stories of people who should have been in the Twin Towers the morning of 9/11 but weren't because they slept through the alarm or had a doctor's appointment. As a control freak, stuff like that should scare the shit out of me because it is proof that trying to control the fate of my life is ultimately futile. And yet I find myself fascinated, not frightened, to consider that my day may be significantly affected by whether or not the stoplight ahead is red or green. Or to wonder how many close calls I may have had that I never even knew about. Or to ponder how my life would be different if I'd been born on the opposite coast.
Rob never intended to be a geek genius by trade. Although he's been writing computer code since elementary school, his true interest growing up was science and, particularly, the environment. He majored in biology. During college he applied to be a summer intern at an environmental agency. To save Rob a long-distance call, his mom called the agency to get the address for where to mail the application, and when the lady recited "Fifty-Eighty-Three Main Street" his mom jotted down 5083. Except, the address was actually 50803. They never received his application. His dad suggested he get a job with a family friend instead, which he did. He wasn't terribly excited to spend the summer working with computers, but it was a job. Turns out, it was a job that completely changed the course of his career. That one insignificant number in the address, a zero no less, was Rob's sliding door.
The end of the movie suggests that the various possible paths of our lives eventually converge, and that no matter which side trail we take (or are taken on), we still get to where we're supposed to be. Although I like the idea of a little magic in the universe, I don't believe everything happens for a reason. I believe things just happen. But still, or maybe because of this, I find the film's ending comforting. The closing scene doesn't actually give us a Happily Ever After, but just presents the possibility of one. In the moments after the hospital's elevator doors slide shut, whatever happens will happen. The comfort is in knowing that the characters will adapt. They may make sense of things by seeing a pattern in the chaos that isn't really there, or they may accept that life is random and all they can do is enjoy the ride. But, they will work with whatever happens next, and it's that ability to accept and adapt that is entirely within our control.
- 1286 reads


Hello! Delurking to say that I saw that movie for the first time a few weeks ago and it really, really affected me in the exact same way you write about, and I've been thinking about it ever since. The fact that the simplest thing -- bending down to tie your shoe or forgetting your cell phone at home -- can mean a completely different path is something I love to think about, even though it freaks me out just a little bit.
Love your blog!
I was about to shut my computer down for the night, saw the title of your post, and thought, "she can't mean the movie??" I think the movie is also great and just rewatched it a few weeks ago. I had forgotten the very ending, but I like it because it seems more real than a Happy Ever After ending. It also makes me wonder if "decisions" or little events have a bigger effect on where we end up and what we end up doing.
It's one of my favorite movies as well. I also like the idea that every possible outcome of a situation happens in parallel universes. So somewhere out there is a Rob working in environmental science and a Kelly still teaching; there's an Erin who stayed in Utah rather than moving to California....I find that it sometimes makes those choices and missed chances a little easier.
Tracing my finger along the curve of a mobius strip has exactly the same effect on me. We may speculate but why anticipate in thought what only experience can teach?
By the way, klog is being a bitch to me again! Time for military camp!
I really love that movie, too. I used to have a little crush on Gwyneth, but... those days are over. However, it's still a good movie!
You MUST go read Dooce today. Her post is a great example of this!
I do believe things happen for a reason, but what you do with what it gives you is completely your free will.
I didn't get into graduate school, but it made me choose a different job and I ended up being able to spend the last few years of my grandparents' lives with them. It is priceless to me.
I like the idea of that movie too. I watch it every time I see it is on.
I too have a crush on John as well though!
And how do you go from Orbitz gum to this?? Pretty incredible!
"Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!"
Ah, John Hannah...sigh...
As you well know, my life could be completely different right now, although I was the "sliding door," I guess you could say, in my situations. But actually, if fate is that which is inevitably predetermined, then it was predetermined that I would make these huge decisions, right? Where do you draw the line with Making everyday decisions v. Fate. Oh dear, why did Phil Smuland just come to mind?! :)
I just heard (or read) this quote the other day which is fitting for this post.
"How do you make God laugh?---Tell him your plans."
I have spent most of my adult life staring at the "sliding doors" in my life. What was, what I thought coincidence, was fate.
I look at a messed up order of "Pizza Skins" at an UNO restaurant, as one of the most monumental, positive life changes that ever happened to me.
And when I look at the 7 years prior to that moment in the UNO restaurant there are too many sliding door moments that led me to that destination.
Welcome, Karyn! Thanks for your comment. It freaks me out a little bit too, but it also liberates my control freakishness somewhat. And ohmygosh, the things on your blog are so PRETTY!
That's a good point, Jenski. We (or at least I) fret so much over every decision, and yet there are lots of tiny things everyday that might have just as much of an impact on where we end up...
I'd never thought of it that way before, Ern - might help me relinquish options as well.
Okay, jane, I totally didn't know what a mobius strip was until I just looked it up and it blew my mind. (Oddly, my seatbelt often seems to become a mobius strip, and usually on mornings when I'm already late for work.)
Hi Charlotte! Yeah, that is a perfect example. Talk about the silver lining...
I think yours is a good theory too, jana. It does sometimes seem, at least in hindsight, that things couldn't possibly have turned out any better even when, at the time, they weren't going right at all.
The fact that you are often your own sliding door, doreen, perhaps indicates that you are wiser and know yourself better than most. And ah yes, the fate vs. free will debate. That was one of my favorite topics in college philosophy (and church).
William, another quote I like along the same vein: "We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." -Joseph Campbell
I love the pizza skins story. And I hope Lauren reads your comment, because it is so sweet and you will totally get some tonight.
This is such an excellent post. I often tell myself to calm down after somebody cuts me off or I miss a light due to slow traffic as I wonder if these delays are meant to happen to keep me safe on the road. Like making that green light leads to an accident 10 miles down the road. And then I wonder if missing that light will cause me to have an accident later and am relieved when it doesn't.
And I am also starting to see good stuff come from my cancer diagnosis. Stuff that would never have happened if something so sucky hadn't affected my life.
The universe is a weird and wonderful place.
Thanks, Kranki. I always like hearing your take on things.
My mom and I watched that years ago when it came out. It resonated with her so much that she mentions it at least once a month that she wants to buy the DVD. I don't know if it impacted me that much because didn't both story lines converge into the same at the end? It kind of goes back to William's comment that there were so many sliding doors moments that led him to that night (or at least I think that's what he said because I just finished reading the pizza skins link and I can't see your comments now). I believe that God knows everything that will happen to us, but I also believe that our free will and consequent decisions are the deciding factor in how things play out. I don't know if I believe in fate, other than that there is a plan for our lives. Surely, God can throw in a few nudges if we get off track, right? But it is what it is. I know I don't sound sane in what I just wrote, and I'm contradicting myself, but I haven't finished living yet. Maybe I'll know more about it then. ;)