grum p. mcgrumpington
kelly | 28 June 2006 - 9:20pm
- I am tired. Because my husband's motherfucking work cell phone beeped all night long with text message (server notification) alerts. And then when the text messages stopped pouring in, the motherfucking thing began beeping its low battery alert. You know, once every ten minutes or so, such that it would beep just as I had fallen back to sleep after being awakened by the LAST beep. Which eventually provoked me to say to Rob, "When I asked you earlier this evening if your phone needed charging, why the hell did you say no?" To which he responded that he hadn't actually checked before telling me no which, I might suggest, was the WRONG answer to give to someone already rather (and by rather I mean VERY) annoyed. Also, when asked "Think you might plug the motherfucker in so we can get some fucking sleep?" the WRONG answer is "Yeah, in a minute - when I get the energy." And then when The Annoyed One gets out of bed to plug it in her own damn self and climbs back into bed a wee bit cold, the WRONG thing to say is, "No blanket! I'm REALLY hot." But, the correct response to that is an empathic yanking of the blanket to one's chin, a terse "THEN PERHAPS YOU SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN UP TO PLUG IN THE GODDAMNED PHONE AS THAT WOULD HAVE COOLED YOU OFF" and a hrumphing onto one's side with one's back to one's husband and one's husband's goddamn motherfucking cell phone. (And don't even ask why he didn't just put the fucker on vibrate because there is no good answer to that, either.) So, um, yes. I am tired.
- Our air conditioner is broken. Déjà vu.
- Two shoe sales people were rude to me today. Okay, not rude. But not friendly. Perhaps they don't understand that shoe shopping is an oasis. Perhaps someone should explain to them that one doesn't fuck with the oasis. That some woman someday might use shoe shopping as a way to escape her sweltering, sleepless life. That when she walks through the door, she will need kindness and soothing. And that, when she asks about a certain shoe which just might be the loveliest shoe she has ever laid her weary eyes upon, not having it in her size is NOT AN OPTION, DAMMIT.
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Aiy yi yi. I can't believe the air con is broken again! Good luck on a speedy repair and also on a good night sleep tonight.
Dang. That sucks. Nothing worse than a beeping cell phone. Mine is permanently on vibrate so it does not annoy me. Of course that is the only reason it is on vibrate. What? What are you insinuating...?? ;)
Broken aircons suck. Hope it gets fixed soon as well.
Beep. Sorry that the AC is busted. That sucks. Beep. I don't get the shoe thing. Beep.
Is Grum P related to Grouchy McGrumpington?
Beep.
1. I awoke this morning at 4am to the sound of Kota and Champ licking themselves. Okay, so I wake up every night to the sound of somebody licking themselves, and I'm at the point where I need sleep so badly that I'm about to get my own apartment.
2. Fuck. Is Mrtl still accepting houseguests?
3. After the day I had yesterday, I would have kicked those bitches n the shins.
Hope today is better, dear. Love and hugs to you.
Beep
Not having the shoes in your size..not cool.
Not cool at all.
Did they at least offer a free dinner at The Palm as a consolation or something?
somebody plug william in before his battery runs out. we definitely don't want him to stop vibrating.
Oh, Kel. I feel your pain. I do. Not to be one who makes everything all about her, but I'm going to make this all about me for a minute. Because TGIM does that to me all the time. And then? THEN? He sets his cell phone's alarm-- an alarm so frickin' annoying it would make the bastard son of Satan cry-- on Tuesday nights. TUESDAY. The night before the morning of my glorious Work-At-Home day, a day of sleeping in until at least 6 AM and wearing my pajamas until I feel the need to leave the house for donuts. And he sets it for 5 AM so he can get up and "get things done" which... HA! but then he just lets it go off and he doesn't GET UP which, excuse me? isn't that the frickin' POINT? and he lets it go and go and gooooo and then it stops and I'm like, aaaaah... and just as I begin to drift off the stupid thing goes off again! This usually happens three times before I start threatening TGIM with loss of Very Special Body Parts if he doesn't get the hell out of bed and freaking TURN! IT! OFF! And I ask him why he set his alarm when he knew it was the morning that I can sleep in and he's all, "I forgot." GAAAAAH!
*deep breath*
Okay, clearly my anger management issues are emerging. Serenity now... serenity now... serenity NOW!
Beep
Yeah, if Leo did that to me, his cell phone would end up INSIDE a body cavity. It's bad enough sometimes he forgets to turn his light off, and when I wake up at 2 a.m. and groggily ask him to turn it off, he pulls more or less the same thing Rob did. Which means I have to sit up (and risk waking the baby sleeping between us), lean over (waking MYSELF up) and turn it off myself.
I can't shove the light in a body cavity. It's attached to the bed. But I guess there is the lightbulb...
RZ,
there is joke here about where I could plug into and who is volunteering but I won't leave it here because I am a gentleman.
Brzzzzzvvrrzzzzzvzzz.
william: oh believe me! that i resisted being less-than-ladylike by volunteering myself for said pluggage-innage and subsequent vibration, but you gots that whole wife-two-babies thing goin' on, so i behaved myself. ;) seriously though, i still need to let you know where i live so you can set me up with a hot hunk down here. ;)
that mofo phone would have been out the mofo window if there was beeping and the person it belonged to, did nothing about it. I'm sorry your AC is broken again, there is nothing worse, seriously.
Yea RZ where do you live? You say "down" But I live in Florida and you can't go much further down than that and still be in the US.
dude, william, your comments always open up opportunities for some naughty innuendos, but i shall behave myself this time and not type anything at all dirty in response.... ;)
First, Kelly sorry I am using this space to send RZ messages.
And B- RZ, I, in my most gentlemanly manner was only noticing that you said you wanted a "hot hunk down here". Hunk of what? Hunk-a hunk-a burning love? Down where? What were you implying? "Down Here" could mean many things to people.
Ah, I can empathize. There are nights when I want to throw my husband's cell phone in the toilet from ringing with crap all night long. Then there was the night it beeped all night long. Of course it was a floor away, but damn if I couldn't still hear it and be annoyed by it. Oh, it was maddening.