showering
kelly | 23 February 2006 - 2:08pm
Last week I got a package from LadyBug which contained the best-smelling bath products ever made in the history of the world. No, really. The bath scrub and gel are made by Snapple, and they smell so juicy! My mouth waters every time I use them. You people have no idea. I wish I could put a scratch-and-sniff sticker on my blog.
And so now I find myself looking for any reason at all to shower. Things that ordinarily would warrant a simple hand wash are now excuses to take a shower. Touched raw meat? Time to shower! Changed the litter box? Definitely need a shower! Swept the kitchen floor? SHOWER! In fact, after peeing I just hop right in the shower. Even when there really isn't time enough to shower, I squeeze in a quickie. I have never been so clean in my life.
I would probably never leave the shower, ever again, except that LB also sent me some Brazilian Nut Body Butter. And slathering that stuff all over myself is sufficient reason to step out of the shower. Because that stuff? Is divine. It's so creamy and smells so hazelnutty. The first time I used it, I might maybe have dipped my finger in and tasted it. I'm not saying that I did, just that I might have.
That same evening Rob and I went out to dinner before our ballroom dancing class, and as we were sitting there waiting for our food to come, I lifted my arm (which had been coated in Brazilian Nut Body Butter) to my nose and took a long sniff. He looked at me like I was odd (?!) and then gave the Please don't embarrass me in public look. But the thing is, I can't help myself! With the sniffing, I mean. (And, fine, also with the embarrassing him in public.)
Then, when I thought he wasn't looking, I licked my arm.
"What are you doing?!" Rob exclaimed.
"Um, nothing. Okay, fine. [LadyBug] sent me this body butter that is to die for and I just keep wanting to eat it. Seriously, it's to die for." And then I reached my arm across the table and said, "Here, you wanna lick?"
He declined, rather snootily, which is really a shame. Because, you know, if he had licked my arm, it would have been a good excuse to shower.
- 1057 reads
all comments photoblog
New tag line.
Kelly licking own Guns (Guns meaning your nicely defined biceps form working out)
sheesh, where is nilbo with all this talk of licking and showering and slathering and nuts (brazilian, that is)?!
dang william, you good!!! (how often do you hear that?!)
Oooh, here's one that'll make Nilbo's head explode:
Kelly's Luscious, Overbuttered Gazongas
Or have we had enough Gazongas taglines already?
It makes me SO happy you're enjoying the bath stuff and the nutter butter (hee).
And Rob totally should've licked your arm. Oooh! Then you could've showered together!
I'm not touching this one.
sage clips the end of the tagline - so I see "keep licking old gu..."
(I keep thinking "guys")
Wishful thinking. ;)
How did Nilbo get this reputation as the resident perv? Oh, wait, I think I know.
Did you see the Scrubs a couple of weeks ago where JD is using all of Elliott's bath stuff, and he's in the tub and opens a little jar and goes, "mmmm, mango body butter". Then later at the hospital he's talking to Elliott and she sniffs a little and says, "did you eat my body butter?"
This is why I don't buy body products that smell like food. I always want to taste them, and of course, they always taste horrid, not at all like what I thought.
Love it, william! And I actually do have nicely defined biceps! Well, I'm starting to, anyway. I am SO excited! (And it's funny that you defined 'guns' just because I almost defined 'body butter'. I was like, Will boys know what that is?)
Seriously, RzDrms! I mean, ain't no way Britain can compare to klog when it comes to the licking and slathering and general, well, whoring around. Am I right? ;)
Oooh, that's good, LadyBug! And I don't think we can ever get enough of gazongas. Again, thank you for the goods!!
Come on, mrtl, you know you want to. Just a little ass slap, maybe?
I'll have to keep the clipping in mind, CM. I could have some fun with that - hee! But even if it were "keep licking old guys," that wouldn't apply to you because you're far from old, my friend. NILBO, on the other hand... :P
Oh my gosh, Ern, I had completely forgotten about that! It was hysterical! I just read your comment to Rob and we laughed all over again. That "Mmmm, mango body butter" line KILLED me! Can I just say that, terrible as this may be, I cannot WAIT for the Olympics to be over so I can get my Scrubs fix!
Heh, good point, Andrea. Although, believe it or not, the Brazilian Nut Body Butter tasted decent. Not as good as it smelled, but not bad, either.
Um...can we get a picture of you licking yourself? Hold on, let me tell Jessica Rabbit about this first.
At first I thought, Hmmm...how very kitten-esk of her, to you know, lick herself (albeit in public?!?!).
But then I read RazDrm's comment and I TOTALLY got a whole new visual. WHOA!!! LOL!!!
I'm a big fan of ORIGINS Smoothing Souffle Whipped Body Cream with Mint, Spearmint, Rosmary and Orange. After a long hot day at the nursery, it really has a nice cooling effect.
Greenie, doll, that may just be the gayest paragraph ever typed. But I'd love to get a sniff of you!
If my wife ever asked me to lick her at a restaurant, I would have 2 words to say.... " Check , Please
You sound positively YUMMY!
I think Greenie just outed himself. Again.
Sometimes I find myself salivating in the scented candle aisle. I totally understand you.
Hee, kristine. Naughty.
YUM, greenie! I would totally eat that. Er, slather that all over my body, I mean. Okay fine - both.
Heh, Ern. And indeed, I have no doubt Greenie smells completely fabulous.
Anon, you definitely need to get your wife some Brazilian Nut Body Butter, then. Like, yesterday. She'll be all about the licking - believe me.
Why thank you, Von!
Ha, CM! Gotta love our Greenie.
I salivate over shoes, TKW, but that's unrelated. I do sniff every dang candle in the candle aisle, though - they smell sooo good!
Too funny! Love your excuses for having a shower!
I totally adore highly scented body products. I have a lemon verbena body scrub from L'Occitane that makes me mental.
Mmmm, I may have to get me some of that, Amy.